:: Shit! ::

Shit may just be the most functional word in the English language.

Consider this....

You can be shit faced,
Shit out of luck,
Or have shit for brains.

With a little effort, you can get your shit together,
find a place for your shit
Or decide to shit or get off the pot.

You can smoke shit,
Buy shit, sell shit,
Lose shit, find shit,
Forget shit,
And tell others to eat shit and die.

Some people know their shit,
while others can't tell the difference between shit and shine.

There are lucky shits
Dumb shits,
Crazy shits,
and sweet shits.

There is bull shit,
Horse shit,
and chicken shit

you can throw shit,
Sling shit,
catch shit,
shoot shit,
or duck when shit hits the fan.

You can give a shit,
or serve shit.

You can be happier than a pig in shit,
or You can find yourself in deep shit.

Some days are cold as shit,
some days are hot as shit,
and some days are just plan shitty.

Some music sounds like shit,
things can look like shit,
and there are times when you feel like shit.

You can have too much shit,
not enough shit,
the right shit,
the wrong shit,
or a lot of weird shit.

You can carry shit,
have a mountain of shit,
or find yourself up shit's creek
without a paddle.

Sometimes every thing you touch
turns to shit.
And others times you fall in a
bucket of shit and come out
smelling like a rose.

When you stop to consider all the facts,
it's the basic building block of creation.

And remember, once you know your shit,
you don't need to know anything else!! =Þ

:: St Patrick's Day ::
first up… HAPPY ST PATRICK’S DAY to y’all!! yupp yupp… for all of you who didn’t know… today (17th March) is St Patrick’s Day… a day to… er, let me rephrase that… a day for for wearing the shamrock, find a pot o' gold, groove with the leprechauns, drink some Irish coffee (in alcohol) and all that… *weak smile* to tell the truth, the significance of St Pat’s Day is totally alien to me… it basically means a night out on the town, drinking loads of green drinks, listening to folksy Irish music, and probably a hangover while attempting to get up and go to work on time the morning after...

St Pat's Day, however, has been a pretty special day for me. things that happen on this day in years past have never failed to amaze me. events that changed me, made me what i am today, both good and bad... buut, oh well! enough on that.

so wadcha doing tonight? see you at a drinking holeeeeeee!!!!!! =Þ

:: Frustration ::

ARRGH!!!!! I HATE THE CHINESE!!!! grrrrrrrr....

guess what, kids? I'm still in the office!!! that's right... it's almost 9, and i'm still here... spent the whole day trijg to fix a ship, and it turns out that we might not even be able to use the bloody vessel!!! grrr... what a waste of time!

:: Fry Your Boss' Fish? ::

A great sample letter for those of you intending to chuck your job!!

Dear Sir (Sir my ass!)

This will confirm my fucking resignation with your fucked up company. I have accepted a lucrative position with a company where being a bitch is not a job prerequisite for managerial skills.

I am looking forward to my new position and the challenges that await me, unlike when I worked with you assholes.

My last day of work will be when you realize I came in late the night before and cleaned my desk, including all the stationery supplies I requested and received last week(haha).

I've deliberately left lots of undone shit for the new fucker, not forgetting the ongoing projects I never completed. I'm certain your dumb ass will never figure out what's happening. Once the company finds out that you don't know a damn thing, they will not only fire my replacement, but your ass as well.

Please feel free not to say a damn thing to me should you see me on the streets, unless you want your ass kicked.

My experience with this fucking company has been very unrewarding.

I appreciate having had the opportunity to use you as a stepping stone to a better future. I wish you and the organization not a fucking thing, bitch-ass motherfuckers!

Fuck you very much.

My worst regards to you and your torn-pussy mother.

Insincerely yours,

XOXO

ooooohhh.... ouch!!! =Þ

:: As I've Matured... ::

As I've matured...

I've learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.

I've learned that one good turn gets most of the blankets.

I've learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just jackasses.

I've learned that it takes years to build up trust, and it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.

I've learned that whatever hits the fan will not be evenly spread.

I've learned that you shouldn't compare yourself to others - they're more screwed up than you think.

I've learned that depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

I've learned that it is not what you wear; it is how you take it off.

I've learned that you can keep vomitting long after you think you've finished.

I've learned to not sweat the petty things, and not pet the sweaty things.

I've learned that ex's are like fungus, and keep coming back.

I've learned that age is a very high price to pay for maturity.

I've learned that I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy it.

I've learned that we are responsible for our actions, unless we are celebraties.

I've learned that artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.

I've learned that 99% of the time, when somthing isn't working in your house, one of your kids did it.

I've learned that there is a fine line between genius and insanity.

I've learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon, and all the less imoprtant ones just never go away. And all the real pains in the arse are permanent.